| It is in our nature as humans to want to be | | | | pleasure in the moment. There are benefits to |
| happy. We strive for many things such as | | | | relaxing, nurturing yourself, and having fun. |
| success, wealth, love, and peace because we | | | | And, even when you're heading toward a |
| believe they will make us happy. Sometimes | | | | meaningful destination, there will be times when |
| though, no matter what we do or how hard we | | | | you'll have to do things that are mundane or not |
| try, happiness eludes us. There is, however, a | | | | enjoyable. |
| path to happiness for each of us and an internal | | | | The overall aim though -- and the path to being |
| GPS to find and navigate that path. | | | | happier -- is to enjoy your journey on the way to |
| It Is Our Nature | | | | a destination that you consider worthwhile. |
| Aristotle said, "Happiness is the meaning and the | | | | Meaning and Pleasure for You |
| purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human | | | | What is meaningful and pleasurable is individual to |
| existence." | | | | each person. |
| The Dalai Lama says, "The very purpose of our | | | | You might find it worthwhile to be kind to all |
| life is to seek happiness....the very motion of our | | | | people, find a cure for cancer, raise your children |
| life is towards happiness." | | | | to be good citizens of the world, start a business |
| More than 2000 years apart these wise men | | | | that helps women be more successful in the |
| speak the same message: it is in our nature to | | | | work world, run a marathon, or countless other |
| pursue happiness. And it is a life-long pursuit. We | | | | things. These might or might not matter to |
| don't just get happy and that's that. We want to | | | | someone else. |
| sustain happiness and get even happier. | | | | When it comes to pleasure, you might enjoy |
| Luckily there is no limit to happiness. No matter | | | | spending time with children, doing online research, |
| how happy you are, you can always become | | | | planning a vacation, cooking healthy food for your |
| happier. | | | | family, mentoring young people, teaching principles |
| But how? How can you become happier? | | | | for living well, or any number of other things. |
| Start by understanding happiness. | | | | Others might derive no pleasure from these |
| It Takes Both | | | | activities. |
| In his book "Happier," author Tal Ben-Shahar | | | | To be happier, you need to do what is truly |
| defines happiness as "the overall experience of | | | | meaningful and pleasurable for you, not what you |
| pleasure and meaning." He says a happy person | | | | or other people think should be meaningful and |
| "enjoys positive emotions while perceiving her life | | | | pleasurable. |
| as purposeful." A person can experience difficult | | | | How Do You Know? |
| and painful emotions at times (this is part of being | | | | How can you identify what is meaningful and |
| human too) and overall still be happy. | | | | pleasurable to you? Listen to and follow your |
| The key is that you need both meaning and | | | | internal GPS: what lights you up. |
| pleasure to be happy; one without the other is | | | | What lights you up (what energizes and enlivens |
| insufficient. When activities that bring you | | | | you) shows you what you love, what you're |
| enjoyment in the present ALSO lead to a fulfilling | | | | passionate about, what your heart is connected |
| future you have the combination for happiness. | | | | to. Your lights point the way to future destinations |
| Imagine a life in which you're focused only on | | | | and goals that will be fulfilling as well as pleasures |
| some goal, some future destination. This is quite | | | | in the moment. |
| common in our culture. It's the "I'll be happy | | | | When you do more of what lights you up, you'll |
| when... " | | | | have more pleasure and meaning in your life and |
| "I'll be happy when I get a promotion." "I'll be | | | | be on your path to becoming happier. |
| happy when I retire." "I'll be happy when my kids | | | | In Your Life |
| are safely through their teenage years." | | | | If you want to be happier (and even happy |
| But if you're not enjoying yourself along the way, | | | | people could be happier), here are a few |
| you won't be happy. A meaningful destination is | | | | suggestions. |
| not enough. | | | | 1) Ask yourself on a regular basis, "How could I |
| On the other hand, imagine a life filled only with | | | | be happier?" You may be surprised to discover |
| pleasures, spending your days eating, drinking, | | | | that when you take time to ask yourself, you |
| reading romance novels, lying on the beach, or | | | | have answers you didn't realize you had. |
| whatever else brings you pleasure in the present | | | | 2) Make a list of what is most meaningful and |
| moment. | | | | pleasurable to you. Do you want to spend more |
| At first this might be quite appealing. But | | | | time on these items? What could you do to make |
| eventually you'd become dissatisfied. You'd begin | | | | that happen? |
| to feel your life was meaningless. Without | | | | 3) Choose destinations and goals for yourself that |
| challenging or stretching yourself, without moving | | | | are fulfilling, not just "shoulds." It may take some |
| toward something worthwhile, you wouldn't be | | | | practice and experimentation to do this and |
| happy. Pleasure is not enough. | | | | noticing what lights you up will provide very useful |
| To Get Happier | | | | clues about what truly matters to you. |
| So how can you be happier? Spend as much time | | | | 4) As you journey to your fulfilling destinations |
| as possible engaged in activities that bring you | | | | and goals, notice your lights. Are you enlivened |
| enjoyment in the present and also lead to a | | | | and energized by your activities? How could you |
| future that is meaningful to you. | | | | be even more lights on each day? Again, it may |
| If, for example, obtaining your master's degree | | | | take practice and experimentation and your lights |
| was a worthwhile goal to you and you enjoyed | | | | can show you what is pleasurable for you. |
| studying and going to classes, you would have a | | | | Happiness isn't limited or scarce. Nor does it simply |
| combination for happiness. | | | | arrive at your door. Becoming happier is a lifelong |
| Or if you enjoyed cooking and did that to serve a | | | | pursuit made easier when you realize you need |
| purpose that mattered to you, such as teaching | | | | both pleasure and meaning in your life. Use what |
| kids to cook healthy foods, you would have a | | | | lights you up to guide you to the pleasure and |
| combination for happiness. | | | | meaning that will bring you more happiness. |
| Yes, you can still spend time pursuing purely | | | | Enjoy! |